Swipe right, connect, and meet someone in a matter of minutes. That’s dating in the modern world. While there is convenience in free dating apps, they may not be the ideal platform for meeting your true love. Let’s take a closer look at the downside of free dating apps and how you can avoid those issues.
Dating Apps Rely on Love at First Sight
Physical attraction is a large part of attraction in general. It’s not the only element though. Dating apps give you a picture and a brief profile. That is not much to go on. At least with speed dating or old-school video dating, you had a chance to see a person’s body language and gauge their personality. Dating apps don’t give you much choice other than to say yes to someone you find physically appealing.
Apps Imply That You Have Endless Choices
There are thousands of people on dating apps, so much that the choices can feel overwhelming at times. How are you supposed to choose ‘the one’ when there are dozens of people who could potentially fit the bill? Having more choices isn’t always a good thing, and it can lead to poor decisions in the long run. You become so stressed about your options that you miss out on a good opportunity in front of you.
In addition to inhibiting your decision making, dating apps discourage commitment. You’re less inclined to commit to someone if you know there are other options out there. There will always be other options, and there will always be elements you do not like about your partner. Search for compatibility, not perfection.
You Only Get to See What Someone Wants You to See
You want to present yourself in the best possible light on a dating app. The person you connect with is doing the same thing. That makes it difficult to see if you have a genuine connection. The filtered version of you may get along great with the filtered version of him or her, but what will you be like when you finally meet? Will the flaws overpower the perks, or will you be able to see past your mutual imperfections?
How to Make the Most of Free Dating Apps
Despite their downsides, dating apps can connect you with people in your area. If you do not get much time to socialize, this may be the only way to meet someone. In that case, proceed with caution. Be open-minded about the experience, but remember that this is a filtered version of someone. If you feel enough of a connection to pursue a relationship, meet up in a public place. Spend time getting to know the real version of this person and find out if you are compatible. Let a close friend know where you are at all times, and set realistic expectations. This may not be your knight in shining armor, but it could be the perfect person to watch movies with on the couch.
Dating Is a Challenge, But It Doesn’t Have to Be
No matter how you approach the dating world, it can feel like a challenge at times. This is especially true if you repeat family patterns over again. You pick the wrong person, you jump to the wrong conclusions, or you just don’t feel worthy of the person you’re with. Sometimes, you need to take a moment to work on yourself before you can truly embrace a relationship.
With the help of a therapist, you can improve your self-esteem, transform your self-image, and learn how to stop the cycle of frustration. Urban Balance offers individual counseling in Illinois, Missouri, and Colorado. We have multiple offices and over 100 mental health specialists on staff. Give us a call at (888) 726-7170 to schedule a consultation with a therapist near you.