Think infidelity is the worst marriage-killer? The truth is even scarier than that — it really *is* the little things that will make or break your relationship. UB therapist Pam Schur, LPC was recently quoted in a Redbook article titled, “The 32 Most Overlooked Reasons Why Marriages Fail.”
Here is Pam’s advice:
You’re falling out of like.
“In marriage, people focus on being in love with their spouse. While true love is a critical component in a relationship, it is equally important to like your partner. Too often spouses focus on the negative and they forget what initially attracted them to their spouse or the positive characteristics they do possess. The secret to everlasting love is everlasting like.”
You’re prioritizing your kids over your spouse.
“A couple’s inability to switch from ‘parent’ mode to ‘couple’ mode after kids are born can damage the relationship. When a couple has children, usually the first thing to go is together time. Most parents expend the majority of their energy on the kids, work and home, leaving little time and interest in their spouse. This lack of interest often leads to alienation and can leave one or both spouses feeling alone. Feelings of loneliness and inattentiveness can lead to infidelity, depression and/or frustration causing a demise in the relationship.”