Do you put others before yourself? Do people in your life describe you as extremely giving or even selfless? If so, you may be engaging in people-pleasing behaviors. While kindness and generosity are wonderful traits, some of us take them to an extreme. Also, people-pleasing behaviors are particularly common among women.
This article outlines how people-pleasing develops and provides tips to reduce these behaviors at home and at work. A few that stand out are: only apologize once for a mistake, and avoid overselling yourself to prove your value to others.
Remember that your worth is inherent; you do not need to constantly demonstrate your value. We often see these patterns and share this guidance with our loved ones, but may not take this message to heart for ourselves. I hope reading this serves as your reminder that you are valuable just as you are and can put yourself first.
Written by: Taejah Vemuri, LCPC, MPH, Urban Balance